Thriving with ADHD: Why Being ‘Always Early’ Isn’t What You Think

At the weekend, something unexpected happened and it made me think a lot about how we see ADHD.

Alex Partridge (the host of ADHD Chatter) shared a clip from my podcast episode where I talked about how I’m always early. I joked about being that person who leaves hours before I need to, as I am SO worried about being late. The other week I contemplated staying overnight in a hotel, ahead of a training session I was running, as I was so worried about being late for it. For context it only took 1hr 45 min on a train, but I was so worried about letting people down.

I didn’t expect my clip to resonate the way it did but the clip took off. Thousands of comments from people saying:

“That’s me!”
“I thought I was the only one who did that.”
“I get so anxious about being late that I turn up an hour early.”

It was beautiful and a bit emotional too, seeing how many people related to that small, honest moment and feeling like people ‘get’ me.

A big myth

Because there’s this big myth about ADHD that we’re always late, disorganised, forgetful or chaotic. And while that can be true for some of us (especially when time-blindness or executive function challenges are involved), for others, it’s the opposite.

We become the people who are never late. We overcompensate. We mask. We plan, double and trip check, set five alarms and end up arriving far too early. With our hearts pounding, trying to look casual while hiding how much energy it took just to get there.

For me, being early isn’t about being super-organised. It’s about anxiety. About wanting to do things “right”. About not trusting myself or time enough to risk being late. It’s a form of hypervigilance, a way to manage the discomfort that comes from living in a world that doesn’t always work the way my brain does.

That’s the thing about ADHD, it shows up differently for all of us. And that’s why connection and conversation matter so much.

When Alex shared that clip, it reminded me why I do what I do.
Why I talk so openly about ADHD and create spaces where we can have these kinds of conversations.
Because for years, I thought I was the only one who felt like this.

Now, I know that there’s nothing wrong with how my brain works it just works differently.
And understanding that has changed everything.

It’s why I started Thrive Membership, my new supportive, feel-good community for women with ADHD who want to feel more connected, confident and calm.

We have weekly virtual coffee mornings (where everyone’s welcome to show up however they are… messy bun, PJs, coffee in hand), monthly masterclasses, guest speakers, a Facebook community and a WhatsApp group that feels like a safe haven.

It’s not about “fixing” yourself or learning productivity hacks.
It’s about finding your people, the ones who get it, who understand that “always early” isn’t about being eager, it’s about being safe.

When you have ADHD, community is everything.
Because when you find your people, the ones who nod and laugh and say, “Oh my gosh, me too!” something inside you softens.
You feel more seen. More like yourself.

So, whether you’re someone who’s always late, always early, or somewhere in between remember this:
There’s no single way to have ADHD.

It’s not just about time management or focus. It’s about emotion, regulation, energy, identity and belonging.

The more we talk about it, the more we realise that ADHD isn’t one-size-fits-all, it’s a whole spectrum of experiences and all of them are valid.

If that clip resonated with you if you saw yourself in it know this: you’re not alone.
And you don’t have to navigate this by yourself.

We’re all just figuring out how to thrive with the brains we have.
Sometimes that means showing up early, sometimes late but always as ourselves.